Merry Christmas from our little "deer"!

We finally heard back from the computer people. There is nothing on our hard drive. Not sure what happened, so I'll be computerless for even longer! :(

Just thought I'd give you a quick Marleigh fix. Want to know what her new favorite toy is? Her fat rolls!!! The other night I was getting her ready for bed. We always let her play naked for a few minutes because she loves, loves, loves to be naked. She was rolling around & laughing. I looked down & she was jiggling her fat rolls around her knees, then laughing at them. It was too funny!

I hope everyone has a blessed Christmas. We are so thankful for all our wonderful family & friends, as well as our little miracle, Marleigh. We bought her a "Baby's First Christmas" ornament that is hanging on the tree. It is right next to a special ornament that we bought for Natalie. Marleigh loves to look at them. She truly is the greatest gift we could have ever hoped for!

We wish you all the happiness over the holidays! Stay warm & safe!

Quick update

Our computer crashed, so I haven't been able to post! I'm taking a quick minute to update from work.... shhhh... don't tell anyone!

The last few weeks have flown by! Marleigh continues to amaze us everyday. She is babbling up a storm & saying more & more consonants. She LOVES the Christmas tree. She tries to grab every ornament & light. Marleigh is starting to think about crawling. Her little rear gets up in the air, & she rocks a little, then it is back down. I've got tons of stories & will update more later! :)

Stay warm!

Happy Belated Thanksgiving!

We had a great Thanksgiving. We were out at Grandpa & Grandma Cline's house. Shannon, Kyle, & Luke were there, as well. Marleigh was in a great mood. She had smiles for everyone. She even held her bottle all by herself for the first time! The only way it would have been a better holiday was if we got to see our Johnson family. We missed them all! Can't wait for Christmas! :)

Marleigh is getting so talkative. Her latest is "dadada da da..... DA!" Not sure if she really realizes that Marc is dada, but I swear the other day he walked in, she smiled, then said, "Dada." She is laughing outloud more & more. She is almost sitting up completely on her own now, too! It seems like she is progressing so fast! She likes to stand up. I just know that she is going to walk before she crawls. With her tummy issues, she doesn't get a whole lot of tummy time. She also LOVES her solids! We have finally found one food that she doesn't like. I had hesitated to give her peas because they seem so gross to me. Well, now I know why. She does not care for peas. It is the only thing so far that she has spit out. She's also not a huge fan of fruits, which I find weird. I've always heard, "feed your baby veggies first, because after they taste the sweetness of fruit, they won't eat the veggies." Marleigh would prefer to eat veggies only. Just one more thing that... nobody told Marleigh! Ha ha!!! :)

My first night away.

Thursday & Friday I had a tax meeting in Wichita. It was my first night away from Marleigh since we've been home. It was a little hard leaving, but it wasn't too bad. Marc had meetings in Wichita as well, so Marleigh spent the night at Grandpa & Grandma's house. I think they had a ball together! :)

I've been promising picures, so here's a link. There's just a few.

http://s460.photobucket.com/albums/qq325/sarbearjo/halloween/?albumview=slideshow

Who needs teething rings when you have socks?!?

Marleigh hates teething rings. You try to put one in her mouth & she makes a sour face. Socks, on the other hand, are the greatest thing since sliced bread! Marleigh pulls them off just a bit then chomps on them. Her socks wind up soaking wet, but it is pretty cute to watch her! I am so hoping these 5 teeth she's working on break through soon!

I'm also hoping that my wisdom tooth doesn't! I went to the dentist last week & I have a wisdom tooth almost to break through my gum. Seriously... who gets their wisdom teeth at 28? The hygienist was laughing at me. She said most people get them in their teens. So, both Marleigh & Mom are teething. Crazy!

Marc headed up to the K-State game Saturday morning. I decided to stay home with Marleigh. Shannon & Luke were going to be home alone, so we kidnapped grandma & went to see them in Hutch. The kids had fun playing together. Marleigh just watches everything Luke does & smiles at him. Luke loves to take care of Marleigh. Luke had a birthday party to go to, so we were going to leave shortly after they left for the party. I was telling him goodbye & told him I would see him at Thanksgiving. He hugged me & said, "K, Sarah. You drive careful. Love you." What a little sweetheart!

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It's snowing! Marleigh's first snow at home. I absolutely love snow! If we only had a fireplace & I could stay home cuddled up with Marleigh tomorrow....

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Today is Grandma Johnson's birthday. Happy birthday!!!! Your card is in the mail... just a day or two late! Sorry!!!

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I have so many new pictures I need to upload. I promise to get to them in the next few days!

I'm such a bad blogger!

I can't believe it has been 10 days since I last posted! So much has been going on.

Marleigh had an appointment with her gastroenterologist Monday. Daddy had to be gone for meetings, so once again, grandma was nice enough to go with us. It was a quick trip. Pretty much down to the doctor and back. Marleigh was such a show off for Dr. Zayat. We had to get her naked. She laid on the examing table, smiling and laughing. She'd roll over, look up, and grin. It was adorable! Dr. Zayat said that Marleigh should be the Gerber baby! Of course, I totally agreed. Okay... now about her appointment. Marleigh is doing great! Dr. Z said Marleigh could have as much baby food as she wants. We are to start on fruits as well. I'm so glad her tummy is FINALLY cooperating!

Pears! Both last night & tonight Marleigh had her veggies, then she had pears. She loves them! She's also eating veggies in the morning. Baby girl loves her solid food!

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Saturday, we went up to the KU/K-State game. It was so much fun! My sister, as well as our old college roommate, Nellie, went with us. Jaeson & Gunnar went as well. Gunnar has so much fun at the games. Good times were had by all!

Lately, Marleigh has been really into whatever we are eating or drinking. Sunday, Marleigh was sitting with Marc on the couch. He had his coffee sitting on the end table. He reached over to pick it up. Marleigh did everything in her power to get her hands on the cup. She was basically rolling over & sitting up trying to get her little paws on it.

Tonight, Marc was holding Marleigh. Music came on the TV so he started dancing with her. I started dancing around too, acting like an idiot. Marleigh thought it was the funniest thing in the world. She was giggling nonstop. We couldn't stop laughing at her laughing!

Speaking of laughing... sneezes are the funniest thing EVER! Marleigh will sneeze then laugh at herself. Or I'll sneeze, & she'll about bust a gut.

It seems like everyday is better than the last. Marleigh is doing more & more. Her tummy seems to be doing better. Her reflux still bothers her some days, but not near as much as it used to. She is just the happiest little girl ever.

Marleigh is an exhibitionist!

Marleigh is not a fan of wearing clothes. She can be fussy, and as soon as you take her clothes off, she is perfectly happy. It's like you flip a switch. When she is naked, she is all smiles. Tonight we were changing her clothes for bed. We were letting her play naked for a little bit. She was talking and cooing, playing with her toes. I walked into the kitchen to start her bottle. Marc was in the living room with her. He hollered at me to come see what our daughter had done. The little stinker had taken half her diaper off and was working on the other side! She just looked at us and smiled. I think we may have our hands full in a few years trying to keep clothes on her!

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Marleigh is also not a fan of her Halloween costume! She was a pea pod. It was adorable, but she didn't seem to think so. I took a few pictures I'll add in the next few days. She was the cutest pea pod I have ever seen! Saturday night, after Marleigh was in bed, Stephanie & I headed to Jami Battin's costume party. I was cheerleader (thanks for the outfit, Jenni), and Steph was a witch. We had a good time meeting some of Jami's friends. They had some great costumes! I've also got some pictures of us that I'll have to add.

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We took Marleigh for a walk in her stroller yesterday. She LOVED it! It was such a gorgeous day. She smiled the whole time, looking around. She definitely likes the outdoors.

I can't believe it is November! Where does the time go?!?

9 months!

Marleigh is 9 months old! :) She had her 9 month check up yesterday. Dr. Williams thinks she is doing amazing! She is now 16lbs, which is in the 10th percentile for 9 month olds. That is incredible considering she was born at 26 weeks! She is 25.5 inches long. Both her length & head circumferance were in the 5th percentile. She is slowly catching up!

Last night we tried some carrots. The first bite, Marleigh gave me a look like, "Mom, this is NOT squash." After she finally swallowed it, she smiled. It was such a cute little grin. Kind of like she was saying, "Okay, Mommy. I guess if I have to, I'll be a carrot monger, too!" She polished off the whole thing. We had some more carrots again tonight. It is so nice not to have to fight tummy trouble every night! :)

Busy, busy, busy!!!

Sorry it has been so long since I updated. We have been busy.... eating squash! Marleigh is a squash monger. I don't think she could possibly open her mouth up any wider when she is ready for a bite. And, she is ready for a bite pretty much instantly after she swallows one! Mom can't seem to shovel it in fast enough. We've got some great video, so some night when I have some time, I'll try to learn how to upload it to the blog! Tonight she ate a full 2.5oz of squash & then followed it up with 3.5oz of formula! I think Marleigh should be a piggy for Halloween! Tomorrow night we will try some carrots. Hope she likes them as much as she likes squash.

When we aren't devouring squash, Marleigh is talking up a storm. She'll talk to us, the tv, her woobie, the ceiling fan, pretty much anything. It is so cute! She is rolling like crazy & has started to army crawl! She can sit up on her own now for a few seconds at a time. She is getting so much better with her balance. Tonight, Daddy even had her standing! She had both arms on the ottoman & Daddy's hand on her back for balance, but most of her weight was on her chunky little legs. She was able to stand there for 15-20 seconds. It seems like she is making so much progress in the last few weeks. We are thrilled with how well she is doing! Marleigh is really getting to be a ton of fun!

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Saturday, I went to my first KSU game of the year. We had a great time. The cats could do no wrong. They didn't even look like the same team from the week before. It was also good to see Marinda & Monica.

Manhattan last weekend was the farthest & longest I have been away from Marleigh. We had thought about staying the night in Manhattan, but I just wasn't ready to do that. I was a little nervous being so far away from Marleigh, but left her in good hands. Marleigh & Grandma had a blast. I am proud to say that I only called to check on her twice! Grandma said that Marleigh had a great day. No reflux & no spit up. Not any!!! Since her tummy was feeling good, Grandma put Marleigh to sleep in her crib. She slept there from 8:30-4:30! That is the all time record for her to sleep in her bed! Maybe we just need Grandma here to put her to sleep every night!

Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day

Today is Pregnancy & Infant Loss Remembrance Day. A day to remember all the angel babies. Losing Natalie was horrible. I honestly don't think there could possibly be anything worse in the world than losing your child. But, we have been so lucky to have such great support from all of our family & friends. There are other couples that have lost a pregnancy or pregnancies & no one knows. No one is there for them during the worst time in their lives. I can't imagine going through that without the love & support we have received. Born or unborn, they were someone's child. Someone's baby. Please take a moment to say a prayer for all the angel babies & their parents.

Natalie's headstone has finally been placed. It is nice to have a proper headstone instead of just a marker. Please feel free to go & visit her. We visit her regularly & appreciate all the flowers, etc. that are left for her.

Eyes, Ears, & Squash!

Yesterday, we went back to Wichita. Marleigh had her eyes & ears checked. Her ear test was at 11:00. We were done by 11:01. Seriously. The entire test took a total of 30 seconds. Her ears are perfect! We went to the NICU & saw some of Marleigh's old doctors nurses. Then we went to Baby's R Us. They were having a HUGE sale on clothes. Although Marleigh has more clothes than I do, I couldn't resists a few outfits. I even picked up her Christmas outfit, which is ADORABLE! Can't wait to see her in it. We then met Eva for lunch. It is always good to see her. Eva is thinking about going back to school to be a Nurse Practitioner. Go for it, Eva! You'd be great!!! At 3:15 we went to get Marleigh's eyes checked. Just like we thought, they were perfect, too. We are thrilled both appointments went so well.

Tonight, Marleigh tried squash for the first time. I was telling Marc to be patient. I was worried that since it was new, she would throw a fit & spit out most of it. Marleigh just had to prove me wrong. She didn't spit out any of it. She ate about an ounce, opening up wide for every bite! I am so proud of her. So far, it doesn't seem to bother her tummy, but we'll see how the night goes. I'm hoping her little tummy will handle it just fine. The last few nights Marleigh has gotten up 2-4 times instead of her normal once. Maybe some solid foods will cure that!

Gastroenterologist appointment yesterday

Today we have been home for 6 months. That seems crazy. Home, sweet, home.

We took Marleigh to her gastroenterologist yesterday. She still hadn't had a good bowel movement. The doctor was very nice. She isn't too concerned with Marleigh's reflux since she's growing well & her spit up doesn't seem to hurt her. The doctor was slightly concerned that Marleigh's tummy is so sensitive. She suggested trying some vegetables & fruits instead of rice. She said sometimes babies don't do well with rice. It is kind of frustrating because when Marleigh couldn't handle rice, I asked her pediatrician if we should try some vegetables. They said, no. They told us rice was about the easiest thing to handle. So here in a day or two, we'll try some veggies. Marleigh's bowels sounded good & her tummy was still soft, but Marleigh has still been having problems with her bowel movements. The doctor prescribed a very mild laxative. She said it would help draw water to the bowels to soften Marleigh's stools. If Marleigh doesn't handle the veggies well or if she still is constipated after a couple of days of the laxative, the doctor will scope Marleigh from both ends.

Well, the laxative worked! Jenni texted me that Marleigh had 2 good dirty diapers. I was so excited. Then Jenni called & I could hear Marleigh screaming in the background. She had a very large, hard stool that she just couldn't get out. I rushed out to help. Again, I don't want to be too graphic, but I was trying to help Marleigh & she was pushing so hard. Once she finally got the really hard stuff, there was some really loose stuff. As Holli, one of our favorite NICU nurses, would say, "Marleigh shot crap across the room." It was all over! My hand & arm, DJ's bed (so sorry DJ!!!), the floor. As soon as it was out, you could tell Marleigh felt so much better. Jenni had said she hadn't ate hardly anything all day. Poor little girl, her tummy hurt. She has had 1 more dirty diaper for a total of 4 today! She's had more today than total in the last 2 weeks! Marleigh just seemed so relaxed this evening.

Monday we head back to Wichita to check Marleigh's eyes & ears. I'm sure they're fine, but we'll check them out just to be safe.

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Stay warm this weekend! We had to put a new fan motor on our furnace. It was just a little bit cold this morning! I think I might have even heard there's a chance for snow this weekend?!? That is just insane!

Daddy's home!!!

Marc got home this afternoon, after basically being gone for 10 days! It is so good to have him home! I have so much respect for single parents. I don't know how they do it day in, day out.

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The other day someone asked me if Marleigh was sitting up on her own or was crawling. When I said she was sitting up on her own for a few seconds, & wasn't crawling yet, they looked at me like I had three heads. This person then commented, "isn't she 8 months old?" Yes she is. Marleigh is doing incredibly well, but please remember, she isn't a typical 8 month old. Her first 3 months of life, she was basically fighting just to live. She didn't get the benefit of being in the womb to grow & develop the last 3 months. Her "adjusted" age is 5 months, which is about where she is developmentally. She's actually a little ahead of where she should be & is rapidly closing the gap. Also, remember the last 8 months haven't been easy on any of us. If we get excited over small things, celebrate with us!

I totally jinxed myself.

I was so proud of Marleigh. She slept through the night both Monday & Tuesday night. She wasn't spitting up & her reflux wasn't bothering her. That came to an end in a big way Wednesday night. Her reflux was really bothering her. She was refusing to go to sleep. As if that wasn't bad enough, I had a horrible headache. Marleigh was exhausted, but kept fighting me to go to sleep. My headache kept getting worse. I finally threw up. By this point, I needed some help. I called Grandma & she came right in. We finally got Marleigh to bed at 1:00am. Normally, she goes to sleep around 8:30 or so. Thursday night was about the same minus my headache. I came to the conclusion that it was probably the pear juice. The juice has some acid in it. I think it was upsetting her tummy. I don't think it was helping anyway.

Today when I got home from work (oh yeah... I'll get to that in a minute), Marleigh was trying to have a bowel movement. I gave her a suppository. Nada. She pushed & cried & screamed. Nada. Without going into too many details, Grandma & I helped her get some relief. It just breaks my heart when I know she is in pain. Once again, I called the pediatrician. The told me to bring her in at 3:30.

We got to the office right at 3:30. We sat in the waiting room until 4:45! I fully understand they are busy, & I was trying to be patient, but SERIOUSLY!!! Waiting with a baby for an hour and fifteen minutes?!? I ended up feeding her a bottle in the waiting room. Dr. Williams wants us to try a little Caro syrup for a few days. If that doesn't work by Tuesday, then he said he will have to put her on some meds. He's not sure that the Caro syrup won't upset her tummy, so that may be an added bonus! (do you sense the sarcasm?)

Marleigh did NOT have any juice today. I had her asleep by 8:15. She hasn't made a peep (knock on wood) & it is now 10:00. Thank you, God, for letting her have a peaceful night! At least so far.

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Did I mention that I am working again?!? I was very torn about whether or not I wanted to go back to work. I love being a financial advisor, but love spending time with Marleigh. I am so thankful to have been home with Marleigh the last few months. I am also excited to go back to work. I like to work. I am very social & like adult interaction. What sealed the deal is that my cousin, Jenni, will be watching Marleigh. No daycare! Just Jenni, Mason (her little boy), & Marleigh! How incredibly lucky are we?!? Starting Monday, we'll take Marleigh out to her. Yesterday & today, Grandma watched her. I am now working at VonFeldt, Bauer, & VonFeldt as an accountant. For right now, I'm working part time. The past couple of days have been great! I've worked with them all before & love it there! I'm also going to opening my own investment business in the future. I am so excited about that! Marc has been so supportive. He told me to do what makes me happy. If I want to work, fine. If I want to stay home, fine. Marc & Marleigh sent me flowers on my first day. :) What a great husband!

Okay... now that this is a book, I'm going to bed! Congrats if you made it this far!

Completely med free!

I posted last week that we took Marleigh off her Prevacid. She was still on her Zantac. Well, it seemed to be upsetting her tummy, too. Her last dose was on Sunday morning. She has basically been spit up free ever since! Who would have thought the stuff that was supposed to help her tummy was actually hurting it. For the first time in her life, she is completely medicine free! :)

She has been such a good girl the last few days. All smiles & giggles. Crazy how much you can love such a little person!

First Trip to Mound City

Marleigh had her first long road trip this past weekend. We headed back to Mound City for Matt's Memorial softball tournament. It was so good to see all of our family & friends. Marleigh finally got to meet her two younger cousins! They are adorable! We have some great pictures. We had such a great time playing ball. Just wish we were getting together for a different reason. Matt is greatly missed.

Since the Johnson clan is expanding quickly, we were able to stay at Jerry & Mary Ann Roy's lake house. Marc is good friends with their son. They have a beautiful house! Thank you so much!!!

Marc's sisters organized a little shower for Marleigh at the tournament. It was very sweet of them. Once again, everyone was too generous! We are so appreciative!

Marleigh road really well for the five and a half hour drive back to Mound City. She didn't fuss at all! She was so good Saturday at the tournament. Saturday night Marleigh was very constipated. We're still battling that. Poor little thing cries & screams when she tries to have a bowel movement. The doctor said to try some pear juice, so we'll give that a whirl. Sunday morning we had our big family pictures taken. Marleigh did really well. All the little ones were good! Can't wait to see how they turned out! She road pretty well the first couple of hours on Sunday, but then was just so tired she fussed a bit. Overall, couldn't have asked for her to be any better!

Grandma & Grandpa Cline met us in Wichita Sunday with Marc's pickup. He has meetings all week in Texas. It saved him like 4-5 hours of driving by them meeting us. It was so incredibly nice of them! Marc will get home late Thursday night & leave again on Friday for Kansas City. Bayer CropScience is a big sponsor of the KSU game at Arrowhead this weekend. He is taking a bunch of customers. He'll finally be home on Sunday after basically 10 days on the road! He's going to be exhausted.

No more Prevacid!

Marleigh has been on Zantac & Prevacid for her reflux. We have noticed that her cheeks turn really red & her tummy seemed to hurt her after her Prevacid. Two days ago we quit giving it to her. She has had two really good days! Her cheeks haven't turned bright red, & her tummy seems to be somewhat better. Plus, she didn't spit up hardly at all today!

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Grandma, Marleigh, & I took a road trip to Hutch today. Marleigh finally got to meet the doctor that was supposed to deliver her! It was so good to see Dr. Cullan as well as Sharis & Jan. They were happy to meet Marleigh, too. If they wouldn't have insisted that I come in that day & took such good care of us, Marleigh might not be here. We are so thankful for Dr. Cullan, as well as his nurses.

We also met Aunt Shannon for lunch. Marleigh was so good all day. She fell asleep in her carseat while we were at Chili's. I was shocked that she fell asleep on her own. Today was also her first time to go into a store. She loved Target about as much as her Mom! She just looked at everything & smiled. She is growing so fast, we had to get her some new clothes!

Marleigh road both to & from Hutch without crying at all. She is such a happy little thing. :)

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Aunt Myra starts her new job at Great Bend Regional Hospital tomorrow. Good luck! We know you'll do great!

Our daughter is no dummy...

lazy, maybe... but no dummy! I put down blankets on the floor for Marleigh to play on. The past few days, I put her on her tummy. Then I place her toys just out of reach, to encourage her to crawl to get them. She still hasn't crawled, but she'll kind of try to scoot. Except she's now figured out to just grab the blanket & pull her toys to her. It's the best of both worlds! She gets her toys, but doesn't have to do any work! I just laughed at her. She must have found it funny, too. She let out a shriek & huge smile.

Today she was playing on the floor & was getting hungry. I went into the kitchen to mix her bottle. When I came back into the living room, she had rolled onto her side, pulling her blanket with her. Marleigh had a fist full of blanket in her mouth like she was trying to eat it! She was smacking loudly. She must have been hungrier than I thought!

Once again, our family is requesting prayers. My back isn't healing from when I fell down the stairs. Dr. Randy took more X-rays because I'm still having pain. It hasn't even started healing. What's worse is that he said there is some calcium loss in 4-5 other vertebrae that concerns him. He put me on a high dose of calcium. Hopefully, that will do the trick. If it doesn't heal, I'll have to have a MRI. Not sure what the next step would be. I'm just believing that the calcium will work!

Oct. 7th

Well, our appointment with the specialist isn't until October 7th. Let's hope I'm still sane by then! I did get her on the cancellation list. The receptionist said just today there were two people that just didn't show up. Nice, huh?!?

Last night we were up from 7:30 til 11:30. At least she is relatively happy when her tummy doesn't hurt. I just hate that she is uncomfortable some of the time & worry about her esophagus. Hopefully the next three weeks will fly by.

More tummy woes...

Yesterday was a horrible day for Marleigh's tummy. I bet she spit up at least 30 times. I HATE reflux & I HATE feeling so helpless when my baby is uncomfortable. I put her to bed at 8:15 last night. She was up by 8:45 because her stomach hurt. We were up until 11:45. We'd burp her & try to put her to sleep only to have to burp her again 10 minutes later. Many of the burps were accompanied by spit up. She would curl up in pain and was so tired. Tonight was a repeat except we only fought it for about 2 and half hours.

We are so lucky for how well Marleigh is doing in every other aspect, but her sensitive stomach is starting to wear on us. We can't let her lay down for over an hour after eating. She spits up all the time. She's uncomfortable. She doesn't nap more than 30-45 minutes at a time, because her tummy hurts. Now we're spending 2-3 hours at night fighting it, too. When she's not hurting, she is full of smiles. She is so happy. I'm seriously tempted to call the pedi tomorrow & ask for a referral to a specialist.

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On a lighter note... I have heard many stories about babies that go #2 in their bath. Let's just say that we now have a story, too. I think we'll leave it at that!

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Marleigh & I attended Randi Turner's baby shower today. Randi is having a little boy & we are so excited for her & Cory. I'm sure Marleigh & Hayden (that is going to be his name) will have lots of fun together as they grow up! I know that Randi, Kiley, Shannon & I sure did!

Rice? No dice!

Okay... I'm laughing at myself right now at the title of this entry... I'm such a dork!

The rest of Monday night was NOT good. Marleigh was moaning in her sleep, would wake up crying, & was curling up like her tummy hurt. Then she was refusing her bottle. I feel so sorry for her. She was also fussy yesterday. We skipped the rice all together last night. Marleigh slept for 7 hours without a peep, then ate, went right back to sleep. She slept another 5 hours without so much as a moan.

I called the pediatrician (again). I'm sure they're sick of me by now. They said her sensitive little tummy probably can't handle it. They told us to wait a month & try again. By then she will be 8 1/2 months, or 5 1/2 adjusted. Not sure what we'll do if she still can't handle it. The bad thing is, we're back to feeding her formula every 3 1/2 hours or so. At one point, she was going 4 1/2 hours or so in between feedings. Like I've said before, we'll do whatever is best for her!

I just hope she can eat solid food by the time she goes to college!

First successful rice feeding!

I hope everyone had a safe & fun long holiday weekend!

Tonight was what I would call our first successful feeding of rice. We finally figured out a system that seems to work. I hold Marleigh & Marc feeds her. He says I was being too timid with her. She ate all the rice that I made for her. Her little tummy seemed upset tonight, so let's hope it was just a fluke thing & not the rice doing it. That's all we need... her to not be able to tolerate rice!

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Marc headed to the KSU game on Saturday. Marleigh & I cheered from home. Here is a like to a few pictures!

http://s460.photobucket.com/albums/qq325/sarbearjo/Game%20Day/?albumview=slideshow

Finally some new pics!

Marleigh has been sitting up on her own for a few seconds at a time. Yesterday, Marc had her sitting on the ottoman. She would fall over & just laugh & smile at herself. She must have done it at least 10 times. It was hilarious!

I finally got my camera software on my computer, so here as some pictures!


Love this one of Aunt Moni & Marleigh!




She's so sweet!


Happy 4th of July!


In the middle of "talking"


Relaxing with Daddy, eating some lunch, and watching TV


Happy girl!


Hostesses of Marleigh's shower: Steph, Jenni, Shannon, Mommy & Marleigh, Kayla, & Jami

There are a few more if you go to photobucket! :)

Marleigh's shower

We are so lucky to have such great family & friends. Today, my sister Shannon, cousin Jenni, & friends Jami, Stephanie, & Kayla threw Marleigh a shower. It was so nice of them. Everything was perfect! They had it at Steph's salon & it looked so cute. They had pink flowers & a clothes line with adorable outfits for Marleigh! The food was great as well. I felt a bit guilty having a shower since everyone has already been so incredibly generous. However, many of the guests hadn't met Marleigh yet, so it was good they got to meet our little girl! Thank you to everyone for all the wonderful gifts! A big thank you to Shannon, Jenni, Jami, Stephanie, & Kayla!

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Shannon & Luke were out at my parents house last night, so Marleigh & I went out there for a couple of hours. Shannon was holding Marleigh & swinging in the swing on the front patio. Luke crawled up there & sat down beside them. He was talking about something then all of the sudden said, "high five, Marleigh!" He picked up her little hand & gave her a high five. It was so funny! He is such a cutie. Always wanting to help out by bringing me Marleigh's blanket or her bottle. Luke was also nice enough to loan Marleigh his little bouncy seat. (Although he had to get into it after Marleigh was in it. Kinda like "fat guy in a little coat..." name the movie) On the lowest setting Marleigh is barely able to reach the floor. She LOVES it. She was laughing & playing. She is starting to get the idea about being able to bounce as well.

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Marc's cousin Sarah got married Saturday. Sorry we couldn't be there, but congrats Carley & Sarah! Best wishes.

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Our niece, Brinley, was baptized today. Wish we could have been there! We still haven't met our two newest nieces! We are so excited for the end of September when we can finally meet them!

Marleigh continues to amaze me!

We got up this morning & headed to Wichita. I was sure Marleigh would fall asleep at some point on the way. Normally, she is only awake about 1.5 hours or so at a time. She woke up at 7:30 this morning & we left around 8:15. She stayed awake the ENTIRE two hour drive! Our first stop was the NICU. Marleigh was all smiles. We got to see Dr. Dorn, and many of our favorite nurses, including Holli, who is very pregnant. When the girls were born she was just a few weeks... doesn't seem like its been that long ago. We also got to see Linda. She told us that she recently got a kitten & named her after Marleigh! Seven months old & already has a namesake! It is always good to see everyone at the NICU. For so long, they were a part of our everyday life.

After we were done at the NICU, we met Eva, another of our favorite nurses for lunch. Marleigh's first time in a restuarant! By this time Marleigh had been awake for four hours straight. I was sure she'd be a train wreck all through lunch. Amazingly, she just looked around & took everything in. She was so good! It was good to see Eva again. We hadn't seen her since we left the hospital. Eva had Marleigh a lot at night. She was also the nurse that took care of Natalie the night she got sick. Eva is very special to us.

Marleigh caught a twenty minute catnap, then we were at the doctor. It took FOREVER at the doctor. Our appointment was at 1:15 & we finally left at 3:30! They pretty much told us what we already knew... Marleigh is amazing! They said she is around a 4-5 month old developmentally. Marleigh is only 4 months adjusted, so that is great. They were very impressd with how attentive & interactive she is. The doctor commented that she would never have guessed Marleigh to be a 26 week preemie. :) We are so blessed she is doing so well.

A guick twenty minute catnap again, & we stopped by Aunt Shannon's office for a quick visit. She hadn't seen Marleigh in two weeks & couldn't believe how much she has filled out in such a short time.

Another twenty minute catnap & then we were home. The only time she fussed during the entire carride was for about six or seven minutes when she had the hiccups. She HATES the hiccups. She only slept a total of an hour from 7:30am to 6:30pm & was so good. We're so lucky to have such an incredible little girl!

7 months old

Man, I'm such a good mom. Marleigh has a doctor appointment in Wichita tomorrow, & for the life of me, I don't know what it is for! When we left Wesley, they just gave us a list of doctor appointments. I want to say it is to check how she is doing developmentally, but not for sure. It might be an adventure... Marleigh & I are driving by ourselves. Marc has meetings in Wichita Monday night & Tuesday, so he'll follow us down. Wish us luck.

We had a pretty uneventful weekend. Marc was supposed to go to Manhattan to celebrate Monica's 21st birthday, but he came home Friday afternoon not feeling well. He thinks he had a sinus infection. He was really dissapointed he couldn't help Monica celebrate. Happy 21st, Moni!!! Don't worry... Marleigh chugged a bottle in your honor! Ha!!! Probably not the same kind of bottle, though.

Marleigh continues to do well on her formula, but doesn't nap well. Her max nap is 30-45 minutes. She wakes up arching her back & squirming. It is obivious she wasn't ready to wake up yet. Not sure if her little back hurts or what the problem is. I'm ready to try anything to help her sleep better. She does sleep for up to about 5hours at night, but she should be able to sleep clear through the night by now. I guess preemies just do things on their own schedule!

Marleigh is really getting chunky. I mean we're talking thunder thighs. They are ADORABLE! Her weight last Thursday was 13lbs. 12oz! She's also really trying to sit up on her own. She thinks she's a lot bigger than she is. We did try to feed her a litle rice tonight. I'm not ready to call it a success... she was too hungry & trying to load her pants, so it didn't go so well. We'll try again in another day or two. It was a two person job!

Happy 7 month birthday, sweet baby girl!

Tragic loss

I know a couple that always seemed to be happy. They have one small child & the wife was about 8 months pregnant with their second. I was horrified to learn that the husband committed suicide on Sunday. When I learned of the news there was instantly a pit in my stomach. I can not imagine feeling that things were so bad, that there wasn't a way out. Especially when you have children. He seemed to love his family. How awful must he have felt to disregard what this would do to them? I am saddened that he couldn't rely on his faith to get him through. My heart is breaking for his wife. I heard that the stress sent her into preterm labor & that she had the baby less than 24 hours later. That is all I know. What should be one of the most joyous moments in her life is completely tarnished now. She has an incredibly tough road ahead. His poor children... it is a tragedy to grow up without a father, but to know that he took his own life... to me that would be the worst.

For now, all I can do is pray. Pray for them to feel God's comfort. Pray that He gives them the strength to get through what lies ahead of them.

Hug your families a little tighter tonight & never take one day for granted.

Golf

Marc & I had so much fun playing in the tournament! It felt like I had a husband again! We did okay for both of us not playing much in the last year. I think we shot about 10 better than we did the last time we played in a tournament. I did make us skip the meal afterwards so we could go get Marleigh quicker (I know...ridiculous!!!).

Grandma took Marleigh to her church in Garfield. She said she was good as gold. Marleigh just loves church. She is always so good! She really likes the music. :) I think Grandma kind of enjoyed getting to show her off a little. I'm still overly cautious. They said Marleigh's immune system would be weak until she was over a year old. The only places Marleigh goes is to the doctor, to Grandma's, & to church.

~~

Marc left this morning for a three day work trip to Oklahoma City. He'll get home Wednesday night, then have to be back in Wichita all day Friday. He'll get home Friday night, then be in Manhattan for Monica's 21st birthday Saturday night. He'll get home Sunday & then leave on another work trip Monday. I think he should be back on Wednesday! Wow!!! That's a lot of traveling! We already miss him!

Randomness

First of all, I want to thank God for being so good! My cousin's little boy, Gavin has been very ill. He was in the pediatric ICU at Wesley for weeks. I am so happy to report that he is now at home!!! Gavin has a long recovery ahead of him, both emotionally & physically. I'm sure his parents, Darrin & Laura, will need some time to recover as well. Having a child that sick for that long has to have taken a toll. Please keep them all in your prayers.

~~

Marleigh has had three good nights in a row! We are thrilled she is feeling better. I was getting to where I would dread evenings. On Wednesday night, after I was taking the nasty pills to promote breastmilk, I was just so stressed & worried about Marleigh. Jenni offered to spend the night with us. Reluctantly, I agreed. I hate inconveincing anyone else. She assured me, that she wanted to. It was so nice to have her here. Thanks, Jenni! Also, thank you to Aunt Joan for keeping Jenni's boys! Sometimes it is just nice to have another female here.

~~

Speaking of the nasty pills... I quit taking them. They weren't kidding when they said they had side effects. Now that we know Marleigh can handle this new formula, I quit taking them. They were making me depressed, jittery, & upset my stomach. No fun at all!

~~

Tonight I was trying to Marleigh to go down. She was yawning & so tired. I rocked her for 45 minutes. She would almost be asleep, then her beautiful blue eyes would pop back open. She'd look around & yawn. I finally decided to put her in her swing. She rocked in her swing for another hour yawning the whole time, but never crying. I asked Marc to get her out of her swing to change her diaper while I made her a bottle. Little stinker was all smiles & laughs for Daddy! He was trying to keep her calm so that she would eat, then go right to sleep, but she was just laughing & cooing at him. It really was the cutest thing & both of us couldn't help but smile back at her.

I then fed her & she decided to fill her pants while she was eating. Of course, I immediately went to change her. Well, the aroma must have been too much for Daddy who was sitting about 5 feet away. He lost his dinner! :( Once he regained his composure, he asked how I could stand such a smell. I guess its just a Mom thing! Ha ha!!!

~~

Marc & I are playing in a couples golf tournament tomorrow. I'm excited, but nervous as well. It will be good to spend some time together as a couple. Grandma has agreed to watch Marleigh (what we would do without her?!?). I'm a little nervous because this will be the longest I have been away from Marleigh since March. I know she's in good hands, but I'm just so overprotective (with good reason, I think). Wish us luck tomorrow! We're just hoping to not come in last!

Prayers answered!

We found a formula! It is such a relief. God truly answered our prayers. I was getting pretty worried about what we were going to feed her. She has had two pretty good nights. She did fuss for just a few minutes, but I think her teeth were bothering her. She has one that is right on the verge of cutting through. I will gladly take 5 minutes of fussiness compared to the 5-6 hours straight. Last night she even slept in her bed! Since we started this formula saga, she would only sleep in her swing. She ate at 10:15, I had her in her bed by 11:00, she slept until 2:45. She ate, then went right back to sleep. She was stirring around 6:30, so I did put her in her swing. She slept until 8:15! I am so thankful that she is feeling better. We appreciate all the prayers!

I did take Marleigh to a chiropractor/kinesiologist yesterday. We decided we'd try anything! My cousin Jenni said that he really helped her two oldest boys. I guess they were colicky & after Mike worked on them, the were a ton better. Of course he didn't pop anything on her, but when we left his office, Marleigh feel asleep before we left the city limits of Great Bend. We fed her when we got home & then she slept for almost three and a half hours!!! She hasn't napped more than forty-five minutes in weeks! She was so relaxed, too.

I am just so thankful & relieved our sweet baby is feeling better!

Frustration

This morning Marleigh was extremely gassy, she was moaning in her sleep, was congested, & was getting a rash. I guess I got my sign. Marleigh can't handle the "liquid gold" either. Then around 1:15, my Uncle Bryan & Aunt Karen stopped by to say hi. I had just finished feeding Marleigh. About 10 minutes later, Marleigh just started screaming & crying. Her little tummy hurt. She was inconsolable. It just breaks my heart to see her like that. I immediately took her to the dr. When I go there, they mentioned all these "gentle" formuals to try. I went through Marleigh's whole history & told them that she couldn't handle any milk or soy based formula. Sometimes I feel like doctors & nursed think I'm stupid! I asked again about Neocate. The ARNP said they had never heard of it. She left for a few minutes to do some research. She came back & said that we should try it. It has no protein whatsoever. It just has amino acids. We ordered some from the pharmacist. I thought the alimentum was expensive.... whew!!! Like, I've said before though, I don't care what it costs as long as Marleigh feels better.

They put me on reglan to try to increase my breastmilk. It can have some not so fun side effects, but I'd gladly take them if it can help Marleigh.


Please pray for us. This is our last resort. I'm not sure what we're going to do if this doesn't work.

Still no formula answer, prayers needed!!!

This morning I called the pediatrician. Turns out that the ready to feed Alimentum is different than the powder. The powder contains corn starch. I guess a lot of babies can't handle the powder, but do quite well with the liquid. So, Marc went out & bought some today. $11 for 32oz! The nurse said it was called "liquid gold". Ha ha! We started her on it at 1:30 today, mixing it 1:2 with breastmilk. She ate it just fine. She hasn't curled into a ball like she did with the powder, but tonight again she was a wreck from about 7-11. The nurse said to keep her on it over night & let them know in the morning. I'm not sure if she was so fussy because of the formula, teething, or just a bad night. I wish I had a clear answer. We are almost out of frozen breastmilk & need a solution.

Please pray that Marleigh will give us a clear sign if she can handle it or not. And please pray we find a solution. Marleigh has been through so much in her short little life, I just hate to think that she isn't feeling well.

~~

On a lighter note, I played softball last night for the first time in 2 years! Let's just say it wasn't my best effort. Okay... it was horrible. We won & had fun, so that is the main thing. I joked that I gave Marleigh all my softball playing skills (which weren't much to begin with ). Marc watched Marleigh & watched Gunnar, too. Or maybe it was Gunnar that came over to watch Marc & Marleigh! We're so lucky to such a great Daddy & hubby!

No hypoallergenic, either.

Well, after 2 days of fighting with Marleigh to eat the nasty stuff, she can't handle it either. Same results: snotty, fussy, won't sleep more than 30 minutes, curling up, just plain M-I-S-E-R-A-B-L-E! So, we'll call the pediatrician on Monday. I think next is to try Neocate, which is even more expensive, but at this point, we'd pay anything. It is by perscription only, or I'd go buy some right now.

Sometimes I wonder why everything we do has to be so hard. It seems to never end.(And, yes, I am having a little pitty party right now. I'm sure I'll be over it by tomorrow.)

My happy baby is back!!!

Getting Marleigh off the soy did the trick! For about 5 days while she was on soy, Marleigh would only sleep for about 30-45 minutes at a time! Plus, I would have to fight her for 30 minutes just to get her to sleep. To make matters worse, Marc was gone for work for 3 of those days. From 6pm-11pm she was a trainwreck! The weird thing is other than in the evenings, she was all smiles.

The last two days, we've fallen asleep within 5 minutes. Our naps our lasting 1.5-2.5 ours & here's my favorite... she's slept from 10:30pm-4:30am! We are so lucky to have such a happy baby! I just feel bad that she didn't feel well for a few days.

No soy formula, either!

When Marleigh was in Wesley, they tried to give her formula. I was convinced she had an allergic reaction to it. Dr. Dorn had told us the only way to tell for sure was to put her back on it again. Of course we said no. I'm pretty sure we were right.

Well, at Marleigh's 6 month check up, I asked Dr. Williams about soy. Since Marleigh had so many meds when we came home, she got to where she didn't eat very well nursing, so I have been pumping, then bottle feeding her. Here in the last few weeks, I haven't been able to keep up with our little chunky monkey, so I thought I better introduce some soy slowly before our deep freezer full of milk ran out. Dr. Williams said to try it or to try the really expensive hypoallergenic formula. I think we can offically say that Marleigh doesn't like soy formula either. While she is teething, I think the formula has been the reason for her not sleeping, fussiness, & tummy troubles. I was reading on the internet & it said that somewhere between 35-50% of babies that can't tolerate milk formula won't be able to handle soy, either. Thank goodness she was only getting small amounts for a few days. She was getting a total of 4oz of soy a day & 32oz of breastmilk. It would have been a nightmare if we would have went cold turkey on the breastmilk. I guess we'll get some of the hypoallergenic stuff & give it a try.

Teething

Not a whole lot going on, other than Marleigh is really teething. It is her upper two teeth on the sides, not her front teeth. She has been a little fussy, but not too bad. It is obvious they are bothering her. She isn't sleeping & chewing on her hands constantly. I've tried teething rings, but they are too big for her little mouth. Tried the cold washcloth, but she ends up sucking on it until she gags. Dr. said we can't use teething tablets because they have something in them that suppresses the respiratory system. So, we're trying Tylenol. We finally did break down & get orajel. It was only as a last resort. She just wasn't able to sleep at all. Poor little thing was just exhausted.

Grandpa & Grandma Johnson were out to see us the first of last week. Of course Marleigh was full of smiles. It was good to see them again. They hadn't seen Marleigh since she was 5lbs! Now she's over 12!

I think I finally have all of our thank you's sent out. We tried to keep track of everything & write it down. Between home, Ronnie Mac, the hospital, & the funeral home I hope we haven't missed any. I did have a couple come back for wrong address. Please, please let me know if I have missed a thank you. We truly appreciate all the generosity so much & I would hate to have missed someone.

6 month DA & teeth!!!

Marleigh had her 6 month check up on Thursday. Dr. Williams said she looks great. She is 11lbs 8oz & 24 inches. She is actually on the normal infant growth chart for length now! She's in the third percentile, but she is closing the gap! We're so excited. Marleigh talked up a storm & gave Dr. Williams tons of smiles. She really likes him!

The past few days, Marleigh has been drooling like crazy & biting on her pacifier. She's been putting everything in her mouth. We assumed she was teething. Then, last night, Daddy say two little teeth trying to poke through! I can't believe she's already getting teeth! She has been such a good girl for teething.

The longest, shortest six months of my life.

I can't believe that I had the girls six months ago today. It was the scariest, happiest day of my life. So much has changed over the last six months. Marc & I have changed so much. We have had so many blessings, but immense heartache as well.

Many people have said that they don't know how we made it through all of this. Some have told me that "God won't give you more than you can handle." I kind of disagree with that one. I know that by myself, I wouldn't have been able to get through the last six months. At the time the girls were born, all I could see was how beautiful & strong our daughters were. I focused on the positives. Other than being micro-preemies, they were healthy. Now, I can't even look at some of the pictures from when they were in the hospital. All I can see are ventilators, IV's, & feeding tubes. No baby should ever have to fight that hard just to live. Marleigh has some scars on her hands from IVs, & a light scar on her cheek from where the tape was for her vent. I tear up just thinking about it. Then our worst nightmare happened. Natalie Grace became an angel in my arms. That's when I know God was carrying us. We had to get up the very next day, & go right back into the NICU to be there for Marleigh. That was probably one of the hardest days. But, Marleigh needed her parents. She needed our love & support. I relied heavily on my faith. Looking back, I know it is what got us through. I think instead the saying should be, "God won't give you more than HE can handle."

I look at the beautiful little girl laying in her crib sleeping so peacefully. She is so amazing & incredibly strong. She truly is a miracle & I thank God everyday for her. She has overcome so much. Two different infections, five blood transfusions, MRSA, a hole in her heart, an allergy to milk, seizure diagnosis. I hope she knows how proud of her we are & how much she is loved!

My sister gave me a sister daily calendar that has sayings everyday. I really like today's:

"One's sister is part of one's essential self, an eternal presence of one's heart and soul and memory." -Susan Cabill

Marleigh rolled all by herself!!

Marleigh was on her tummy tonight on the floor. All by herself, she rolled to her back!!! She did it at least three different times! We are so proud of her! She is so amazing.

Tomorrow Marleigh will be six months old. It doesn't seem like she could be that old, but in other ways, I can't even remember life without her. She has her six month check up tomorrow. I'll let you know how it goes!

Marleigh met Logan!

Wednesday night we loaded up in the Tahoe & headed for Logan's house. When we got there, he was eating. He didn't have any oxygen on & was satting 99! He looked so good! Both he & Marleigh didn't seem too interested in each other. Logan promplty fell asleep after eating & Marleigh was so tired. She was a little bit fussy. It was so good to see Logan, as well as Cory & Jatim outside of Ronnie Mac & the NICU.

~~

The past few nights Marleigh has slept 6-7 hours straight! Woo Hoo! Almost 6 months old & finally sleeping more than about 4-5 hours. She is so strong, she gets out of blankets when you swaddle her, yet she still needs to be swaddled because she wakes herself up. So, we got out our kiddtopotomus (sp?) snugglie (thanks Clint & Lynn). It is a miracle worker!!! That thing is like a staight jacket, but it helps her to stay asleep longer!

We've got a scooter! (sort of)

Daddy gives Marleigh a lot of tummy time. He puts her on her tummy on his tummy. She has been really working her legs & holding her head up really well. If Marc puts his hands down for her to brace herself, she'll scoot! It is so cute. He puts her down on his tummy & she scoots herself all the way up his chest! I can't believe how strong she is. :)

In the past few days she is noticing her hands & reaching out to grab toys! She has some colored rings & loves to hang on to them. She also loves to watch the TV! If we would let her, she would sit & watch it for hours. If she's looking at it & you stand between her & the TV, she leans to try to look around you. It is pretty humorous. It's bad that I already have to limit her TV time! I have to turn it off during play time.

Marleigh is now 10lbs 14oz! Still averaging a little over an ounce an day. Pretty impressive.

Brinley Lorraine Harris (& Marleigh update)

Marleigh is a big cousin again! Brinley Lorraine Harris was born at 5:02pm. Both Brinley & Megan are doing well! Congrats to Chewy & Megan! She was 8lbs 1oz & 20 inches long. We can't wait to meet her!

Marleigh's reflux has really been bothering her lately. We took her to the dr. again yesterday. She is now 10lbs 8oz & 23 inches long! She's growing at an insane rate!!! But I'm not complaining. She has a lot of catching up to do! They prescribed her some prevacid & we can already see improvements. She slept for 6 hours straight last night. A new record!

Another minor change... I'm now a stay at home mommy! :) Marc & I have thought about it since before the girls were born. I'm so looking forward to my time with Marleigh. She is so expressive & so much fun! I'm sure at some point I will go back to work, but am looking forward to my mommy time! Since I'm no longer working & my old cell number was a bank number, my new cell phone number is 285-1225.

Happy Belated 4th of July!

We had a nice weekend! Thursday night we finished up with harvest for the most part. We have one more circle to cut, but it has to wait until tomorrow. It was nice to have Marc around for a few days!

Aunt Monica & her boyfriend Phil came out to see us on Friday. We have a great picture of Aunt Moni & Marleigh. It was good to see them!

This year, fireworks were legal within the city limits. Let's just say that Marleigh is NOT a fan. Friday night I had just gotten her to sleep & the neighbors started shooting them off nonstop. Marleigh woke right up. We turned up a radio & thank goodness she went right back to sleep.

Saturday, Marleigh wore her 4th of July dress that Crazy Grandma bought her. She was so cute. It says on it, "Miss Independent". Isn't that the truth!!! I've got some good pictures of that, too! I'll have to get them uploaded. Saturday night Marc & I went out for the second time since the girls were born. Crazy Grandma & Papa Bob were nice enough to come in to watch Marleigh. We went out to dinner, then stopped by Jaeson's house for a few minutes to watch the fireworks. I am very proud of our little town's fireworks display. Especially since Great Bend didn't even have fireworks this year.

Today Aunt Myra & Kurtis came in to see Miss Marleigh. She was awake for the first few minutes, then slept through the rest of their visit. How rude! Ha ha!

I hope everyone had a happy & safe 4th! Thank you to all our service men & women & their families for their sacrifice & service in order to keep us safe! God bless you all!

Mom is a klutz!

We had a bit of a scare last night. I was home alone with Marleigh & I was taking her downstairs to her room to rock her to sleep. I had her swaddled tightly & we were almost to the bottom stair. My feet slipped out from underneath me & I fell... hard. Thank the good Lord that I held on to Marleigh. I knew I was hurt, but checked Marleigh over. All it did was scare her. Within 10 seconds she had calmed down & was smiling at me. I crawled to Marc's office & called both Marc & Grandma. They rushed in. I called Dr. Randy Schmidt & he said he would stay open. I have a slight compression fracture of a vertebrae. Thank you so much, Dr. Randy!!! It could have been much worse. He said it should heal on its own. If it would have been worse, they would have to cement it together. We were really lucky. I cried most of last night just at the thought of what could have happened to Marleigh. I didn't sleep much. I just watched her monitor, which has a little pendulum on it that shows her breathing (I think I hypnotized myself). This morning I heard her cooing in her crib. I went into her room & she was wide awake & all smiles. It was like she was saying, "Mommy, I told you, I'm just fine." I know that Marleigh's little sister was looking out for her. I just can't even bear to think about the possibility of hurting my sweet little girl.


~~

Aunt Shannon emailed me this morning. When they were here this weekend, we would tell Luke, "shhhh... the baby is sleeping." I guess the last couple of nights when Shannon reads him his bedtime story, he says, "shhhhh... baby is sleeping." How cute is that?!?

Pictures!

I realized last night (at about 4am while feeding Marleigh), that she has now lived here in her home longer than she lived in the hospital! Woo Hoo!!! It is crazy to think we have been home so long. I can't believe she is 5 months old already!

Here is a link to some pictures. Too many good ones to add here.

http://s460.photobucket.com/albums/qq325/sarbearjo/june29/?albumview=slideshow

Okay... for some reason the link doesn't work, but if you cut & paste it will!

Finally!

Well, it now officially feels like wheat harvest. I ran the grain cart today for a few hours. It felt good to be in the field, but I missed Marleigh! She was in good hands. She was at Grandma's house. Aunt Shannon & Luke were there, too. Marleigh had fun with them this afternoon. Luke is getting so big. He's 18 months & wearing 3T clothing. He is so funny... or "punny" as he says. He has a bit of a problem sayin his "f's" but will tell you all the time that he is "punny".

Daddy is still out cutting wheat. Marleigh asked me today where Daddy has been the past few days. The guys have been working long hours. Marc got home around 12:30-12:45 last night & was gone again by 7:00. They have got to be exhausted! Please pray that we keep having a safe harvest!

Hungry, hungry hippo....

or baby should I say! Marleigh has been eating like crazy the last few days. I'm talking 5-6 ounces every 2.5-3 hours! It has been crazy. She has also been spitting more in the last week or two. It seems her reflux has been acting up. I thought they probably needed to up her dosage of Zantac since she's growing so fast. I made an appointment to take her to the doctor. 23 days ago, she weighed 8lbs 9oz. Well, today she weighed... 9lbs 12oz! No wonder she has been eating like crazy. She now gets .6ml twice a day instead of .4ml. Hopefully that will help.

The other big news... Marleigh had her first cereal today! The doctor told me to try some really, really diluted in her bottle. She said it would help with the reflux & maybe sleep a little longer. I questioned this because everything I've read said not to put it in a bottle, but the dr. insisted it was okay. Marleigh took it like a champ! She is now sleeping away! I'm hoping this will help her start sleeping longer at night. Last night she ate at 9:00 then was up at 12:00, 3:30, 6:45. I would just LOVE if it would help her to sleep 5 hours or so. I just can't believe she's on cereal already!

I was just thinking.... less than 3 months ago (April 8), Marleigh weighed 4lbs 13 oz. She has gained 5lbs in just 11 weeks! :) I've got some good pics of her too.... I'll try to get those uploaded sometime this weekend.

Correction

Marc said I needed make a correction. He had both combines stuck on Monday & then one stuck yesterday. Both combines also had water in the headers Monday & took quite some time to get back up & running.

Stay posted for more adventures in Wheat Harvest 2009!!!

Father's Day, Baby Logan, & Wheat

We had such a great father's day! Marleigh slept really well Saturday night in her bed! We got up & got ready for church. Of course Marleigh had to get out all her dresses to see which one she wanted to wear! She slept through most of church, but then decided she was hungry! Daddy mowed the yard. Then we went out to Grandpa & Grandma Cline's for a steak. It was yummy!!!

Marleigh got Daddy some new LED lights & accessories for our hopper bottom trailer. She had Mommy call Uncle Jaeson to help. He was more than happy to help out. According to Daddy & Uncle Jaeson, its all about looking good! Well, the semi & trailer now look pretty darn good!

~~

We are so incredibly excited for baby Logan & his parents, Cory & Jatim. Logan went home today!!! After being so sick a couple of weeks ago, he is doing so well now. He isn't able to take all of his feedings by mouth yet, but I'm sure he'll get it in no time. Please remember them in your prayers. It is so great to be home, but as we know first hand, a little scary, too!

~~

It is H-O-T!!! But, we're glad for the wind & heat. The guys are cutting wheat! Moisture was in the 11-12 range so as Papa Bob says they are "makin' 'er smoke!" I'm just waiting for a phone call to see who is the first one to get stuck! For the first time in many years, I'm not out in the grain cart... at least not yet. It feels kinda strange!

Random...

Well, I should have complained about Marleigh not sleeping in her bed a lot sooner! She has done so much better in the last few days. We are relieved... we were about to go broke buying batteries for her swing! Ha ha!!!!

~~

Daddy & Uncle Jaeson started to cut wheat yesterday afternoon. (They keep telling Papa & UB that they're taking over the farm!) I think they were both pretty excited to get started. It was continuous & was making 45-50 bushels/acre & around 60lb test weight. Not too shabby!!! Unfortuantely, it has been raining pretty much all day, so no harvest today. It is POURING at the moment. The good thing is we still haven't had any hail. Monday night we were in line to get pounded with some pretty big hail. We said lots of prayers! The storm died right as it was getting to Pawnee county. Thank you, God!

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We had a nice relaxing day today. Marleigh is getting so interactive & loves playtime. We lay her on the ottoman. She kicks, smiles, coos, & almost laughs outloud. With just a little help she can roll from her back to her tummy. I don't think it will be too many weeks until she can do it on her own.

Little Miss Marleigh is getting quite the attitude. When you stop feeding her to try to burp her, she lets you know that she is NOT happy about it. She has also gotten into the habbit of trying to watch TV while eating. I finally had to turn it off this morning so she would pay attention to what she was doing.

Marleigh's diapers have Sesame Street characters on them. Daddy has been singing Cookie Monster's song to her. You know, "C is for cookies, & cookies are for me." Anyway, she just smiles & coos when he sings it to her. Now it is about the only way to change her diaper without her getting upset. It is pretty cute!

She slept in her bed last night!

Finally!!! Marleigh slept in her bed from 5:30 clear until 8:30 without making a peep! It was pure heaven!

Thanks for all the suggestions. We have a positioner in her bed. It is a wedge to keep her inclined. We also have a fan in her room to make noise as well as a radio playing. I'm telling ya, we've tried EVERYTHING!

We're just happy she slept in her crib even for a little while!

Sleep...or the lack thereof.

We can not get Marleigh to sleep in her crib. No matter what we try, she will only sleep about 45 minutes maximum. Now if we put her in her swing, she'll sleep upwards of almost 6 hours at night. I've tried everything I can think of. I've let her fall alseep in the swing & moving her later. No dice. I've rocked her for over an hour & then put her in her crib. Nope. She's not having any of that. I've tried swaddling her tightly. I've tried leaving her arms free. I've tried propping her feet up like they are when she is in her swing. Why won't she sleep?

Need help.... Need sleep!!! Any suggestions?!?

Logan

Baby Logan is a really sick little boy. He has had some major complications since his surgery. Please say extra prayers.

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/loganwagner

Cardiologist appt. last week & our weekend.

What kind of mom am I?!? I forgot to update about Marleigh's cardiologist appointment last Wednesday!

Marc was in Kansas City (again) for meetings so Crazy Grandma was nice enough to go with us. Marleigh was such a good girl! She slept the whole way down to Wichita. They did an EKG, then did a sonogram of her heart. For the sonogram, she was supposed to lay still. Marleigh is normally so active, I was worried. She did great! She sucked on my finger & I sang to her. She laid there for about 15 minutes while Dr. Allen checked out her little heart. Her VSD (hole between the bottom two chambers of her heart) is smaller than before! It is still there, but Dr. Allen said that he has had former patients with larger holes in their hearts go on to play college sports. Everything else looked great! He thinks that within the next 3-4 months it will close completely! We are so thankful that everything looked good.

They also weighed her. She is now 8lbs 9oz. :)

This weekend Mom, Marleigh, & Crazy Grandma went to Hutch to Aunt Shannon's. We had so much fun! I got some good snuggle time with Luke & Aunt Shannon got some good snuggle time with Marleigh.

When we got home yesterday, Marleigh was in such a good mood. She was all smiles & is very close to laughing out loud! She is making high pitch excitement noises. It is adorable! She also rolled from her back to her side. She really is growing up so fast!

Keira Madeleine Barrett

Marleigh is a "big" cousin! Keira Madeleine Barrett was born on Wednesday. She was 8lbs 6oz & 21.5 inches long. Pretty much the same size as Miss Marleigh! Keira as well as her mom, Michaela, are doing well! We are so happy for Ryan, Michaela, Reese, & Keira! I'm sure the girls will have so much fun together in the years to come.

One of Marc's other sisters, Megan, is due in July with... you guessed it... another girl! That makes the count 5 girls, 0 boys for the Johnson's! The funny thing is the Cline's are the exact opposite. Jenni has 3 boys, Jaeson has 1, Shannon has a son, and Jake has a son. Funny, huh?!? There were 6 boys before our girls.

Logan Wagner

Logan was born about a month after our girls. His parents, Corey & Jatim lived at Ronnie Mac with us & they are super nice people. Logan has had a rough start to life, but is a fighter & has been doing amazingly well. He is going to have surgery today. He is having quite a few procedures done. Please pray for Logan, his parents, & the doctors & nurses. Here is a link to his caringbridge sight:

http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/loganwagner

Natalie

I know that most people don't know what to say about Natalie. I know their hearts are in their right place. However, there a few things that have been said or not said to me that I would never want said to any other parent that has lost a child.

Please don't act like she never existed. Someone said they don't want to mention her, because it might upset me. She is our daughter. She is Marleigh's sister. She may not still be with us here on earth, but she lives on in heaven. Regardless of if you mention her or not, I think about her many times a day. Some days are harder than others. What would upset me is people forgetting about her beautiful little life. She was so amazing & so strong.

Someone told me, "I bet you appreciate Marleigh so much more." No, I fully recognized that both of my daughters were incredible gifts from God from the instant they were concieved. I feel so blessed & honored that he chose me to be their mother.

I've also heard, "at least you still have Marleigh." Yes, I am very thankful for my beautiful Marleigh, but that will NEVER replace Natalie. No child ever could. Each child is a unique miracle that can never be duplicated.

Then there was the comment, "at least she wasn't any older." I realize she was only 27 days old, but again, this was my baby. This was a part of my heart. It doesn't matter if she was 27 minutes, 27 days, or 27 years old. We spent every day with her. Holding her, sitting by her side. We were there the day she got sick clear til the end. Age has nothing to do with it. She was our little girl.

We will never be the same. We will never forget her. We can only hope to work through some of our pain & live for our precious little girl that we still have.

4 month check up

Marleigh had her 4 month check up on Thursday. We got her naked to weigh her. She pottied all over the scale not once, but twice! She is now 8lbs 6oz naked! 13 days before that she was only 7lbs 7oz with clothes on! She's really packing on the pounds. She is 21 inches long (longer if they would have stretched her out). Dr. Williams said she is doing great. We are so happy & thankful!!!

Aunt Shannon gave us a snuggli. It is a little harness type thing that I can put Marleigh in & wear her. Shannon had said that Luke hated it, so we could have it if we wanted. I decided to Marleigh in it yesterday. As much as Marleigh likes to snuggle, I thought she might like it. She absolutely loved it! We walked around the house & she even fell asleep in it. Last night we went on our first walk. We were gone for about 20 minutes. It was nice nice to get some fresh air & enjoy the beautiful evening. Thanks Aunt Shannon!!!

Professional Pictures

We took Marleigh over to Jack & Jill Portraits today. Despite hiccups, wetting on Pam's blanket, & not wanting to sleep, there are some really good pictures. Pam was so great with Marleigh. Check them out if you get a minute! You do have to create an account in order to see them.

http://www.jackandjillportraits.com/store

Access code: 0bcf93c0

Enjoy!!!

Memorial Weekend

Saturday, Marc & I went out for the first time together for something fun. We went to a wedding in Great Bend. We left home a little before 3, & were home before 8. I just couldn't stay away! But, it was so nice to socialize again! Thanks again, Crazy Grandma for staying with Marleigh!

Sunday we headed to Hutchinson for a cook out at Aunt Shannon & Uncle Kyle's. It was a beautiful day & we had so much fun. We're starting to feel like real people again! I was commenting that I was out in public two days in a row!

This afternoon, we took Marleigh out to see her sister. There were so many beautiful flowers around Natalie's grave. We were telling Marleigh about Natalie, & Marleigh started smiling. For some reason, it gave me a sense of peace. I know that Natalie is with Marleigh always as her guardian angel. Rest in peace my sweet, little baby.

Here are some recent pictures of Marleigh. She is such a special little girl & continues to amaze us every single day.





One of my favorites... in Daddy's glasses.

A lot to catch up on!

A couple of days ago, Marleigh started getting irritated at the end of her feedings. We decided to switch to the next size up nipple on her bottles! She did awesome! She's eating quicker & not getting upset. I think she just couldn't get enough milk fast enough.

We received a letter from Sunflower Diversified. They had said Marleigh was doing great when they were here last week. It stated that Marleigh is acting age appropriate in ALL 5 categories! Not adjusted age, but actual age! That is so impressive being that she was over 3 months premature.

Daddy had meetings in KC yesterday & today. He got to see one awesome Royals game last night. They were down 3 in the bottom of the ninth. They scored a run, had back to back homeruns, then had a sacrifice fly to win the game! Wish I could have been there, but he did get me a T-Shirt!

Since Daddy was gone & Marleigh hasn't been sleeping at all at night, Grandma offered to come in to stay with us. The night before I had only gotten about an hour of sleep. Daddy had offered to help, but he had to leave early for KC. So, I took Grandma up on the offer. I felt bad that Grandma would be up all night, but to my suprise Marleigh slept from 1:15am-4:45, then ate & went back to sleep until 8:45! She's never done that!!!

Tonight when Marc got home, he was playing with Marleigh. She reached out & grabbed her rattle! She had grabbed fingers before, but had never reached out & grabbed any other object. I was so proud of her.

It seems like she is growing up so much in the last couple of weeks!

Bath out of necessity!

Saturday afternoon Marleigh & Mommy were hanging out. All of the sudden Marleigh filled her pants. I went to change her & it was like she had exploded! It was up her back almost to her neck, out both leg holes, & out the top of the sides. She was a complete mess!!! It was our first bath out of necessity! I undressed her, held her out at arms length, & headed straight for the bathroom!

Here are a few recent pictures!

"They scanned my cat..."

(Name the movie) No, they really didn't do a cat scan, but another EEG today to check for any seizure activity. Great news... her EEG was normal! No more seizure activity! Over the next two weeks, we'll wean off the phenobarb, which is great! Marleigh was such a trooper. She slept through the test. We are so happy that she will off of the nasty phenobarb. They weighed her today as well. A whopping 7lbs 7oz!

We stopped by the NICU again to see some of our favorite nurses & to see Marleigh's boyfriend, Logan. (Logan is doing amazingly well, by the way!!!) It was so good to see everyone again. We also got a family picture by the framed book & plaque that Eva put up. We were sad we didn't get to see Eva. She normally works nights, so we'll have to call her next time & have her meet us for lunch or something. I'll hopefully get the pictures posted in the next day or two.

Aunt Rina graduates from K-State tomorrow. Daddy is going to make the trip, but since we had a big day today, Marleigh & I will stay home. Congratulations, Marinda!!! We are so proud of you!

Marleigh is developing ahead of schedule!

Work has gone pretty well. I've managed to only call to check on Marleigh once per day! Grandma is loving her time with Marleigh. I'm sure Marleigh is loving it just as much.

Sunflower Diversified came to the house today. They were here to check on Marleigh's development. They were so impressed with her! She was raising her head, moving her arms & legs with control, grabbing fingers, tracking things with her eyes, & cooing. She is doing so much more than she should right now. At this point, she should be acting like a two week old. They said that she is acting more like a two-three month old which is great! It can take preemies up to the age of two before they are up to speed developmentally. She is doing so well that they feel it isn't necessary to have regular meetings. They said we could wait & reevaluate in another six months. I really want to make sure Marleigh has every advantage, so they agreed to come back in a month to see her. I knew she was doing well, but didn't know she was such an over-achiever!!!

Our other big news of the day is that Marleigh is developing a social smile. Previously it had just been when she had gas. This evening Marc was holding her. He would kiss her cheek & she would smile. He must have kissed her at least 10 times & she smiled each time. It was so cute!

My first Mother's Day

First of all... Happy Mother's Day to all the Mommy's!

We had a great day. Marleigh is such a sweetheart (or maybe Daddy is). She got me beautiful princess cut diamond solitaire earrings. I have always wanted princess cut earrings! I was so suprised. I'm such a lucky Mommy to have such a sweet daughter & thoughtful husband.

Being a Mom is the most amazing thing. I am so blessed to be Marleigh & Natalie's Mom. They are both miracles & I am so thankful for every minute that I have been their Mommy. It really is a love like no other.

Grandma & Grandpa Cline came in & we grilled some steaks tonight. They were mighty tasty. They also stayed with Marleigh for about 45 minutes when Marc & I stopped by a crawfish fry that our friends were having. It was the first time we had both left her. It was nice to see some friends, even for a little while.

Tomorrow is my first day back to work. I'm sure Marleigh & Grandma will have a great time together... it's me that I'm worried about. We'll let you know how it goes!

Chunky Monkey!

We took Marleigh to get weighed today. My guess was 6lbs 4oz. Daddy's guess was 6lbs 2oz. Both of us have commented on how big she's getting just in the last week or so. She's been eating a lot more, too. To our surpise, Marleigh was 7lbs 1oz!!! However, we did weigh her with her clothes on this time. But how much can her clothes weigh?!? Surely not more than 5-6oz max. So, we'll say she's at least 6lbs 11oz. We are so glad she's growing!

Two weeks ago when we were at the dr., he said if she goes two weeks with no A&B's we could ditch the monitor. Well, she's done great! Her last A&B was over 7 weeks ago. So, we took it off last night. Marleigh loved it! It was so tight around her little chest. If you didn't have the little band cinched down tight, it would alarm that it wasn't making a good connection. Now we can carry her anywhere in the house without worrying about her wires & having her monitor plugged in!

Crazy Grandma (Grandna Cline that's what she calls herself) came in today. She will be watching Marleigh when I go back to work next week. But, I'm lucky... its only part time! For the first time, someone other than Marc or I fed Marleigh. Both Grandma & Marleigh did great. What a relief.

Marleigh & I took her first trip that wasn't to the doctor. We stopped by the bank. Everyone couldn't believe how much she looks like Marc.

Here are some pictures that Aunt Monica took last weekend.

Nobody told Marleigh

Before we left the hospital, they told us that Marleigh would act pretty much like a newborn at her due date. Well, nobody told Marleigh. They said she would start to raise her head a little. Nobody told Marleigh she shouldn't be doing that already. She's been picking her head up & turning it for about 6 weeks now. They said she would eat about 60-70mls by the time her due date was here. Nobody told Marleigh. She's been taking 90mls pretty consistently. They said she would be awake for 1-2 hours at time. Nobody told Marleigh. She has now been awake for 3.5 hours. She shouldn't be grabbing onto things. Once again, nobody told Marleigh. She grabs onto our fingers & tries to help hold her bottle. She is so amazing!

There is one thing that I wish somebody, anybody would tell Marleigh: 10:00pm- 6:00am is time to be ASLEEP!!!

No weight check today.

We were supposed to take Marleigh for a weigh in this afternoon. Our pediatrician has an office here in Larned. We loaded Marleigh up & headed to the office. Well, the clinic here in Larned is only open the first 4 Thursdays of the month. So, no weight check today.

Yesterday was my original due date. It really is weird to think that the girls should have still been in my tummy until now. Marleigh is so expressive & has such a big personality. Her facial expressions are priceless! We are so blessed to have such a beautiful little girl as our daughter.

Eyes are perfect!

We had our final ROP exam today. Marleigh's eyes were perfect. She was in her carseat basically from 11:00 to 8:00 & she was such a good baby. We are so proud of her! We got to see the framed book & plaque. It was so thoughtful of Eva. Here are pictures of that as well as a few of Marleigh! The second to last picture is of Julie & Marleigh. The last one is Eva & Marleigh. :)

Finally!!!

Marleigh was wide awake yesterday from 2:00pm until almost 7:00pm. We were hoping that would lead to her sleeping more during the night. Well, last night we fed Marleigh & put her to bed around 10:00. Marc said he would stay up with her. I told him I was feeling lucky, we should both go to bed. Little girl slept clear til 2:00. I got up & fed her at 2:00 & she slept until 6:00! It was pure heaven!!! She was awake this afternoon from 3:00 until 7:00 & full of smiles. Hopefully tonight will be a repeat performance!

We go tomorrow for her final eye exam back to Wichita. We're pretty sure she's in the clear, but have to check once more. We're going to stop by the NICU. One of our favorite nurses, Eva, framed our favorite book "God Gave Us You". She hung it along with a plaque in honor of Marleigh & Natalie. It was incredibly sweet of Eva. We can't wait to see it hanging. I'm sure all the nurses will be amazed at how much Marleigh has grown in the last 3 weeks.