Talking with Marleigh about Natalie

Marleigh and I were playing in her room last week.  Daddy and Kade were out in the living room.  She has really been big into talking about how Daddy and Kade are boys and Mommy and Marleigh are girls.  We were coloring, and so sweetly, Marleigh says, "It's just the girls in my room.  Except we're missing my sister, Natalie.  Someday, I'll play with her in heaven." 

Instantly, I choked up. I mean, we've talked about Natalie with her, but never in great detail.  Prior to that day, Marleigh had never brought her up on her own.  I grabbed Marleigh and hugged her so very tight.  I don't think she understood why her crazy mama was crying and loving on her so much. 

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On Sunday before the girls's birthday, we took a trip out to Natalie's grave.  Marleigh kept saying, "We're going to see my sister, Natalie."  We tried to explain that we were just going out to a place to remember Natalie, that her spirit was in heaven. Marleigh wasn't quite able to comprehend all of it, but you could tell she was trying to process it all. 

Obviously, Marleigh is getting to the age where she is understanding more.  I struggle with how much do I tell her and when do I tell her.  We have never let her see any pictures from when her and Natalie were in the hospital, because I don't want it to upset or scare her.  On the other hand, I don't want to keep her in the dark about everything that her and Natalie went through, either.  This weighs so heavy on my heart.  I know this will be something that she will have to deal with and work through as she grows up.  The last thing I want to do is to make this any harder on Marleigh than it has to be.  Please pray that God will guide us in the right direction.