"How many children do you have?"

Yesterday, Kade and I had chiropractor appointments.  While we were waiting, a lady was commenting on how cute and how happy Kade was.  She asked is he was my first baby.  I told her that he had older twin sisters.  She then asked how old they were.  I explained that Marleigh was two and a half, but that we lost our other daughter when she was four weeks old.  The woman immediately looked down at her feet and said, "Oh.... I'm so sorry."  That was the end of our conversation. 

The woman at the chiropractor responded like most people do.  Usually, it is an awkward response, and the converstation ends.  I end up feeling bad for the person that asked about how many children I have.  How could they have known?  It is obvious that they don't know how to respond when I mention that one of my daughters is an angel.  Someone once said, "Well, it is easier to just say that you have two children, instead of trying to explain to a complete stranger."  I'm sorry, but the fact of the matter is, I have three kids.  I always will.  Natalie existed.  She is my daughter, but she just happens to be in heaven, now.  My answer will remain the same: "I have three children, but one of my daughters became an angel when she was 4 weeks old." 

I hate that it instantly changes how they look at me.  Instead of smiling at me, they now look at me with sorrow, or don't look at me at all. I hope people don't mistake why I always include Natalie.  It isn't for sympathy or pity.  I don't want to make people feel uncomfortable. I don't want people feeling sorry for us.  It is plain and simple.  Natalie is our daughter and will always be a very important part of our family.