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My hardest prayer to pray is praying for acceptance: full, whole-hearted acceptance. Praying to accept His will and His perfect timing when His will or timing differs so greatly from what I had in mind is a real challenge for me.
In his heart a man plans his course,
but the LORD determines his steps.
I can remember when I was in preterm labor. I prayed non-stop that He would keep the girls safe for a few more weeks. We all know that was not in His plans. As the girls were born I can remember questioning His will.
As the first couple of weeks went by, I found it gradually easier to accept God's will that our daughters were born early. They were both doing fairly well, so the acceptance seemed to come fairly easy. When Natalie got sick, I prayed again. I poured out my soul and prayed that God would heal her. I found myself again doubting His will for them to be born so early. Why would He allow that? They were tiny, innocent babies.
After losing Natalie, it was very hard for me to pray. I could not comprehend why God would let our precious little girl die. I was broken spiritually. I was incapable, at that time, of accepting God's will. Over the course of the past two years, God has used Natalie's life to teach me so much. My prayer life has grown considerably. My relationship with God has deepened. He is continuing to use her to work in my life. It took me a long time to fully comprehend that I have to accept, not understand, God's will. He knows far better than I do.
God’s will and timing are perfect. Maybe not in our eyes, but for His purposes it is.
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As it is Easter weekend, I have been doing a lot of thinking about the Easter story. God’s timing and will were perfect in the life of Jesus. It caused tremendous suffering and pain, but knowing it was God’s will, Jesus endured the cross. He knew God’s will and timing were perfect in his life. How awesome is it to be able to draw somewhat of a parallel from Christ's sufferings to our sufferings on earth? Jesus willingly accepted God's plan for his life. He endured unfathomable pain, but knew God had something so much better in store: Eternal Life. Today my prayer is that I can continue to learn from Jesus. That I can be more Christ-like and accepting of God's will.
Well said Sarah! By the way, I think we have many more "blog-lurkers" than we might think!
ReplyDeleteI read ALL of your posts, but don't always comment. I hope that's okay. I find it comforting that you, me, and your other commenter all struggle with accepting God's will, in our own way. And I really appreciate the parallel you drew here.
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